Hot and Cold Men and What To Do with Them

In the beginning things between you and him are very hot and you and can’t help but get your hopes up that he may be the one for you. But then all of a sudden the next week he is completely cold and you are left wondering what happened and if you did something wrong. And if you are one of the lucky ones, this pattern goes on for some time through your dating relationship with him.

If this sounds familiar to you, then you are not alone. I know plenty of women who have had their share of hot and cold men and let me tell you, these types of men are so very frustrating.

hot and cold men

The thing that makes this so frustrating is that when things are hot, they are good, very good. You are happy and you may even think he has changed and this could really be it. But things turn on a dime and all of a sudden he’s not returning your phone calls or texts, or he is cancelling plans with you or he simply disappears on you.

With this type of man he has the control in the relationship if you keep taking him back after his cold spells. He basically decides your relationship status and you are at his mercy. This is not a healthy relationship at all and will most likely leave you brokenhearted.

Why Is Your Man Hot and Cold?

If you are going through this situation right now the best thing you can do is to figure out why he is so hot and cold towards your relationship.

There are some men that may pull away from the relationship without even really realizing it, but most men know what they are doing when they follow this pattern.

Look at what is going on in your relationship. Has some sort of big event or milestone happened and it may have scared him off? Has he been hanging out with his single friends lately and they have been influencing his decisions? Or is he just the rude, conceited type of man that strings women along?

A lot of the time a man may turn cold towards a relationship because he thinks it may be progressing too quickly or he’s not sure if he is ready for a committed relationship. This is very natural and happens often.

But, if your man keeps going from hot to cold, then this is a different story. This type of man is not worth your time and emotional effort. He is immature and selfish and should have no room in your life no matter how much you may think you love him.

What To Do with Hot and Cold Men

So, what should you do with a hot and cold man? Well, it all depends on your situation.

The best thing that you can do is give the guy some space to think things over. Most women assume if they give their guy some space he may never come back, but if he really is into you and wants a relationship he will come back.

This means that you don’t call him every day or try to text him all the time. Instead give him at least a week or so before you even try to contact him again. If he is interested in you, he will contact you before this time or he may see your text or message and realize he’s being and idiot about your relationship.

The worst thing you can do is to constantly text him or call him. This will drive him away even more. Plus you don’t want to look like you are desperate and absolutely need him in your life. Live your life, have fun and let him come back to you.

If your guy consistently repeats this hot and cold pattern then you need to talk to him about and it may just be time to end the relationship and regain control of your life. Try not to have an attitude or get too upset but you need to let him know that you have feelings and you can’t take the hot and cold anymore.

Depending on how he reacts and what he says, you may need to gather your strength and have the confidence to call off the relationship completely. You have to realize that you can’t change a man and he has to be able to change himself. Also you can’t keep repeating this pattern and living day to day wondering if you are going to have a boyfriend or not. Stop giving him the control and find a guy that will love you every day of the year.

Lastly, make sure that you stay true to your words. Don’t tell him that it is over and then keep taking him back because he says he has changed. You need to stay strong and follow through or you will just keep suffering from the same confusion and heartache over and over.

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